Heartbroken

Juz came home. I did went for midnite kbox last nite. But things turned out bad right after that. It is hurting so much in me. It hurts and I cried. And who was there to care for me? No one. You wasnt there. I duno what you want anymore. You said you wouldnt make me cry again. But you were never there when I cried. Coz I was always crying for you. It's so painful. I feel like giving up. Where is my dearest darling? You weren't like before anymore. Why? Today is your only free day for the week and I cant even enjoy it happily with you. So many things I did juz to pei ni. Alot of times I was going against my own principles. I love my pets the most and treated them better than anyone else including myself. But I've neglected them lately coz to pei ni. I never went out dat late at nite coz my parents would be worried. But I do it now just to spend time with you. I've never had 3-4hrs sleep daily before. But I'm almost doing it everyday now. I gave you all I had. But? If you dun love me anymore, suan le. You dun have to force yourself to be with me. It's hurting so much now. And It'll be the same if you leave me. Unless you are still my dearest darling. But are you? Ask yourself. For the whole week I was so lonely I missed you so much. And all I had is today to spend with you. Now nothing is left. One day I just wanted to spend this day happily with you. I wasnt angry or anything. I'm feeling very upset now. 8 days later then I can be with you. And perhaps by then we would have gone separate ways.. I am so lost now.... Who is there to soothe my heart that feels so painful now... Where is my dearest darling who would give me a nice warm hug...... I'm going to sleep now. I dun wana wake up. I juz want to continue sleeping. I dun wan to feel the pain.