I reli hate it!!!!!!

Why? Why force me??? You have known me for 20yrs. Dun you know me well enough? Am I just plain stingy? Am I just plain heartless?? Or am I just so unfillial??? You jollywell noe I dun earn alot. When I say I have no $ means I dun have. Why keep forcing me? When I were young you cant let me have what I want. I dun blame you. Now that I have someone to dote on me, you tink that both of us very rich? Then keep FORCING me for this n that? I only earn this much. I have my own spendings. I try to give you abit monthly, somemore when i get bonus, on special occassions and such. You dun have to keep asking from me. When I can I will give you. Dun u noe me well enough? Why keep squeezin me dry? It really fustrates me and hurt me alot u noe.

I also wish to earn more. I am stuck in this job. Trying to find my directions. I want to have a stable career. No need to be something very superior. Just a job that I will enjoy and enough for my spendings. To also pamper my loved ones. I am working hard to achieve this. Stop bugging me! I have my own plans. I dun need you to look up or look down on me. I just need ur understanding and ur love. When I can i wish to pamper you also. Or maybe u juz dun tink so. Haiz... It reli hurts. I've reli got nothing to say already.

You noe, these days i noe my temper haven been good coz dear is not around. Coz i miss him too much it affects my mood. I noe it hasnt been fair to my loved ones and friends. Especially you. Lately I told myself this, I dun wan to carry on this way. I want to treat my loved ones and friends from the bottom of my heart. Not letting my emotions and temper affect me that way. Coz I truly love all of them too. But you... All people but you... I'm really so lost for words. Issit that you muz squeeze me dry till I've got no life to enjoy??? I hope... One day.... You really understand me... Haiz....

How I wish.... Dear is here with me... I just want a nice hug..........